XVIII
The tortoise

 Today, when I arrived in Shambala, I found myself at an enormous silver lake and there was nothing and nobody around.   Suddenly a dome materialized on the surface and there was a bridge to reach the building.

 I started walking along it, it swayed a little. When I arrived I found the place full of wizards who were milling around.    They were wearing dark blue tunics with yellow, six-pointed stars on them. They gave me the same tunic and we sat in a circle. The wizards started to invocate something by moving their hands...an entity started to materialize in the centre.

Then I started to feel bad and to feel sick… I looked at what was happening without wanting to. Thank God Ananda ran in and, taking my arm, took me out of the circle, made me give the tunic back and took me outside. When we were on the bridge, she told me that the star wizards were a kingdom of illusion, a parallel kingdom to Shambala, and that it was not my place, because they lived in the illusion of the reflection of the Creator.

We entered the real Shambala and we walked in some gardens. The whole path was full of monks with shaved heads dressed in orange tunics. They were all smiling and they were very young. They were putting pieces of brightly coloured silk in the grass and on top of that rose petals and petals of other flowers. There was a lovely breeze and everything was flying about in the air.

Then we arrived at a dome in the shape of a pagoda. Inside a congregation of Buddhist monks was praying. They were orange beings, the illuminated from the Orient, who accompanied their prayers with drums and cymbals. 

We passed among them down an aisle formed by their bodies and we came to a master of their tradition, who had a shaved head. He was a small man with big hands. He was sitting on a cushion and he gestured for me to sit opposite him on the other violet cushion…

  He looked down at me with a distrustful smile like someone who could read you inside, and he asked me the following questions:

  Monk – Why are you sad?
  Nyako – Because I feel alone and lost – I replied
  M – But you are with us
  N - Yes, but something in me is not here...
  M – Do you know what it is, this thing that is not here? – And he put his hands together on his breast.
  N – It’s a sensation of impotence or failure  - I replied.
  M – Look at your brothers and sisters, they are all happy to exist, they are praying and sharing. You are the same as us, we accept you and we love you like one of us.
  Our hearts and yours are joined as one, in one sole prayer, in one sole oration…
  No, you are not alone, my love, you are with all of us and we love you…

  I looked down at the floor and I felt accepted, some tears ran down my cheeks and I felt a little better. I was tired of being alone. When I looked back up at him, I found him smiling with compassion, trying to reach my heart through his eyes.

  Then he put his hand inside his robe and he pulled out a little tortoise made from Tiger’s Eye and he showed it to me and said:

Like this animal are you
Like the sacred tortoise
Walks slowly
Carries his house with him
Looks at everything slowly
And his time is different from the others
Sacred tortoise
Walks on the path
With an open heart
And feels happiness flowing into him...

And he slowly placed the tortoise in my hands and he gave it to me. I felt sad and grateful. At the same time. The monk placed his hands in front of his face and bowed his head in farewell. I got up from the cushion and went to Ananda, and we left the pagoda.

  Once outside we started walking and Ananda remarked in a low voice:

You must have patience
The processes are slow
Now you are starting to see yourself
And your wounds are old and deep
But don’t fear, for the light will come
And you can be happy in your heart

Now go in peace and don’t worry
You and your tortoise
Will always be welcome
In the kingdom of Shambala...